So today has been a really hot day here in the valley. We spent our sunday being lazy and not straying far from our little window A/C. Dinner time rolled around and I was hesitant as to what to do. I didn't want to order out and I didn't want to spend too much time in the kitchen. So i scrolled through pinterest. Nothing was appealing to my hungry tummy until i stumble on an old pin. Rajas con crema. I didn't have any rajas which is basically sliced poblano peppers that have been grilled and peeled of their skin and sliced. That is too much work. So I changed the recipe around to suit my needs. It came out soooo good! I call it Veggies con Crema. Here it is!
you will need:
two tomatoes
one small onion
two jalapenos
two small zucchini
one large green bell pepper
two cups of sour cream or greek yogurt or salvadorean or mexican crema
salt and pepper at preference
butter or oil for cooking the veggies
one cup of cooked white or mexican rice
****in a small pan roast jalapenos slightly, you don't want them to get too spicy
1. heat butter or oil in a pan at medium heat and saute the onion and tomato until the onion is soft and almost translucent. I added a bit of salt.
2.add the bell pepper and zucchini chopped to your preference (i cut into slices and cut those slices into big chunks)
3. while those veggies are cooking cut your jalapenos in half and take out seeds. chop into little squares.
4. add jalapeno to rest of veggies
5. pour in your cream ( i did one cup of salvadorean cream and one cup of greek yogurt.)
6. I added more salt and some black pepper
7. put fire on low and let it simmer until it starts to bubble. (uncovered)
8. you are done! serve over rice and enjoy! really it was so good!
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Short and sweet and a little gray.
I'm not afraid of much. Mainly two things, spiders....and getting old. And when I mean old I mean like really old. I fear having to wear a diaper some day and have to rely on someone else to wipe my ass. I fear having to lose those I love. I fear what I will look like and what kind of health I will have. Will I have any teeth? Hair? Will I be hunched over? Maybe my real fear is that of the unknown. That seems so far from now that it's such a hard concept to grasp. OLD OLD OLD.
But tonight was the first time that I almost felt excited about growing older. I was sitting down on the floor beside the couch were dimas was laying and saying good night to him. It had been such a crazy day and we hadn't spent much time together so we started talking. As he talked to me, I started playing with his short black hair and I noticed a gray strand peeking through. I smiled. I started to think about how cute Dimas would look with salt and pepper hair. How happy I am to know that I want to spend my life with this man and that I am excited to see who he becomes. I am excited for the adventures we will have. It was almost like I let go and stopped trying to resist something that can not be resisted. I have control issues. And so i know that's a part of my fear. But just knowing that Dimas will be there with me as I get old makes me feel so much better. Thank you little silver strand for showing me your wisdom. Good night.
But tonight was the first time that I almost felt excited about growing older. I was sitting down on the floor beside the couch were dimas was laying and saying good night to him. It had been such a crazy day and we hadn't spent much time together so we started talking. As he talked to me, I started playing with his short black hair and I noticed a gray strand peeking through. I smiled. I started to think about how cute Dimas would look with salt and pepper hair. How happy I am to know that I want to spend my life with this man and that I am excited to see who he becomes. I am excited for the adventures we will have. It was almost like I let go and stopped trying to resist something that can not be resisted. I have control issues. And so i know that's a part of my fear. But just knowing that Dimas will be there with me as I get old makes me feel so much better. Thank you little silver strand for showing me your wisdom. Good night.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
How I'm feeling
10 things that I'm feelin'
1. Good, calm relaxed
The weather has been almost summerish this week. low 90's. clear skies. sunny days. we've been going out and taking advantage. park trips, eating fresh foods. The night comes and it's my favorite. The windows open, the crickets serenading with their sweet sweet music. The cool breeze drifting in. It feels nice. The night, in this weather? my favorite. It soothes me. the weather itself almost feels like a sweet memory, i guess because the beginning of spring/summer always makes me feel this way.
2. Anxious/Excited
I feel like I need to get up and go somewhere, or get up and move around. I have an itch, but I don't know where to scratch. Almost like there's something that's going to change soon. Something is drifting our way and I don't know what and it makes me feel anxious and yet so excited.
3. Guilty
I think as a mother and a wife and a friend and a sibling and as a child to someone you are always going to struggle with guilt. Did i spend enough time with my child today? Did I clean enough? Cook healthy enough? I should have called my mom, I wonder how my brother is. I wish i had more time to spend with everyone. Etc. etc. etc. It can be anything really. But it's there and it's nagging. Something I want to go away. I want to focus on loving myself and being forgiving with myself and reminding myself that I do the best that I can with whatever variables im working with at the time. and from day to day my best will be different because of xyz. I have to make it a habit to stop being so hard on myself. it's good to have goals, and to always be changing and growing of course. but within that there doesn't need to be guilt. just acceptance of what is, and to change it if whatever didn't make me happy at whatever given moment. i didn't like that i messed up and that's okay, i will try better next time. i will remember next time. you can start over a million times in a day. if you let yourself and if you love yourself.
4. Grateful
I try to be grateful for things everyday. And when i make it habit it gets so much easier to do. there's so much beauty in the world. so much to be happy about. My son's smile. The food on my plate. The blue sky and the trees. I really love the trees. I am so grateful that they are in my life. I can sit and just be with a tree for hours. I am grateful to be ALIVE. To be able to see the world, taste it, smell it, touch it. Life is such an amazing adventure. Everything about it, AMAZING. The good, the bad, the not so good, all of it! I am just so grateful to be able to experience it all.
5. Worried
Along with my guilt I also worry a lot. A LOT! My baby daddy is always telling me to get out of my head. I worry about the homeless, and the flowers, and the orphans in El Salvador. The elephant at the zoo. My neighbor Janet who is getting old and lives alone. I know it's not my place to worry about these things. Worrying doesn't get me anything but stress and a bad mood. I want to remember that instead of worrying that I can do something about it. Even if it's small, I can help in my own way. And then the rest is up to the journey of life. Everyone is here living their own unique journey and at the same time we are all linked up to one another in a BIG journey. I can respect the BIG journey and do my part and I can respect the little journeys and let them do their thing. Life is good, all of it and everything and everyone will be okay. In my heart I know that through the suffering and the sadness or through the struggles, each and every one of us will ultimately be okay. Even the bad really isn't bad. Just a time for learning and growing. Life is made up of choices, some made by the mind and some made by the soul. But every choice has been ours. Even the ones we think we didn't make, we did. Or at least that's how I see it. So yea I need to not worry.
6. Frustrated
Dominic is three. Three is HARD. It's almost like at this point my son is in some sort of limbo. He's not a baby anymore but he's not grown yet either. And it makes for an interesting mix. I struggle with patience and I struggle not to yell. I feel like right now I have to be so aware with what I do or say. As a baby that wasn't such a worry. he wasn't really paying all that much attention. but now he is watching everything and repeating everything. I catch him saying stuff sometimes and im like where did he learn that, it's awful, and then it hits me that he learned it from me. it's a good learning experience for sure but so so hard. he wants to fight me on everything. what he eats. when it's time for bed. when it's time to get dressed or go out. he doesn't want to brush his teeth or eat good foods. he jumps on the couches at other people's houses and calls me stinky and tells me he doesn't love me. sometimes it feels like he's thirteen not three. and sometimes i feel alone, like im the only one going through this. thank god for other blogs! it reminds me daily that i'm not alone! i love my wild thing i really do. and i give it my all everyday. but sometimes i just feel so frustrated and i question if im doing this parenting thing right. I hope I am. but when i feel judged by others or my mom tells me to remember that im the parent and he needs to remember who has control, I get frustrated because they don't understand. for those that don't have children and they judge? you're an asshole, just wait and see. and for those who's kids have long grown up? you have forgotten what it's like. Dom makes it even harder because he is stubborn, and relentless, and highly sensitive and needy. Some of those qualities will work wonders for him someday, but for now they have this mama worn out.
7. Sad and nostalgic
A very dear, good and old friend of mine is leaving to another country tomorrow. I don't know when I will see her again. She's going on an adventure and I feel so happy for her, but the selfish part of me wants to keep her here. She is like a sister and she's taking a piece of me with her. I watched her pack tonight as we talked and laughed and joked around. I helped her too. I held back tears and pushed them back into the land of denial. Even now I can't really bring myself to accept the fact that she's leaving. We don't see as much of ourselves now as we use to when we were in high school, but that's how it is. but i knew she was here for when ever i wanted to see her or talk to her. i won't have that comfort anymore. of course we will keep in touch, thanks to technology. but it won't be the same. it's hard to let go of someone you get along with so well, you don't run into those people very often. the kind you can tell anything too. the kind that laugh at the same weird things that you laugh at. the kind that still think farts are funny just like you. the kind you can have a full conversation with just through the eyes. the kind that you can go a year without seeing and when you do see them it feels like you just saw them yesterday, nothing awkward about it, no small talk. yea she's that kind of friend. i still remember the first time i met her. big sparkling brown eyes, cute round face and bright yellow sweater and jeans. a shy warm hello and smile my way. i have loved her since then. see you later sweet friend. be happy and be safe. though i am sad now my heart is so full with hope for your fresh start and happiness. i love you.
8. peaceful
it's one thing to be happy and another to be peaceful. I have been striving for inner peace. the kind of peace that isn't rocked by outside sources. the kind that stays flexible and swaying through thick and thin. lately i have been feeling so peaceful. just trusting in the now. knowing things will turn out alright. it feels good. i have my moments, like stated above, but inside of it all i feel peaceful, those are just things i need to work on to further strengthen this peace.
9. healthy
striving to eat more nutritious foods has really got my body feelin' good. and it's so much easier now to know what does and doesn't work for my body. i have more control over what i eat at a more conscious level. it's easier to stay away from temptation. my body craves the food it needs. water, big salads, healthy fats. stuff like that. and i know im headed to a better place. and even though this food journey isn't complete i am definitely feeling healthy.
10. content
life is good. my soul and my belly feel content.
have a wonderful rest of the week lovely souls! tell me, what are some of the things you have been feelin' lately?
1. Good, calm relaxed
The weather has been almost summerish this week. low 90's. clear skies. sunny days. we've been going out and taking advantage. park trips, eating fresh foods. The night comes and it's my favorite. The windows open, the crickets serenading with their sweet sweet music. The cool breeze drifting in. It feels nice. The night, in this weather? my favorite. It soothes me. the weather itself almost feels like a sweet memory, i guess because the beginning of spring/summer always makes me feel this way.
2. Anxious/Excited
I feel like I need to get up and go somewhere, or get up and move around. I have an itch, but I don't know where to scratch. Almost like there's something that's going to change soon. Something is drifting our way and I don't know what and it makes me feel anxious and yet so excited.
3. Guilty
I think as a mother and a wife and a friend and a sibling and as a child to someone you are always going to struggle with guilt. Did i spend enough time with my child today? Did I clean enough? Cook healthy enough? I should have called my mom, I wonder how my brother is. I wish i had more time to spend with everyone. Etc. etc. etc. It can be anything really. But it's there and it's nagging. Something I want to go away. I want to focus on loving myself and being forgiving with myself and reminding myself that I do the best that I can with whatever variables im working with at the time. and from day to day my best will be different because of xyz. I have to make it a habit to stop being so hard on myself. it's good to have goals, and to always be changing and growing of course. but within that there doesn't need to be guilt. just acceptance of what is, and to change it if whatever didn't make me happy at whatever given moment. i didn't like that i messed up and that's okay, i will try better next time. i will remember next time. you can start over a million times in a day. if you let yourself and if you love yourself.
4. Grateful
I try to be grateful for things everyday. And when i make it habit it gets so much easier to do. there's so much beauty in the world. so much to be happy about. My son's smile. The food on my plate. The blue sky and the trees. I really love the trees. I am so grateful that they are in my life. I can sit and just be with a tree for hours. I am grateful to be ALIVE. To be able to see the world, taste it, smell it, touch it. Life is such an amazing adventure. Everything about it, AMAZING. The good, the bad, the not so good, all of it! I am just so grateful to be able to experience it all.
5. Worried
Along with my guilt I also worry a lot. A LOT! My baby daddy is always telling me to get out of my head. I worry about the homeless, and the flowers, and the orphans in El Salvador. The elephant at the zoo. My neighbor Janet who is getting old and lives alone. I know it's not my place to worry about these things. Worrying doesn't get me anything but stress and a bad mood. I want to remember that instead of worrying that I can do something about it. Even if it's small, I can help in my own way. And then the rest is up to the journey of life. Everyone is here living their own unique journey and at the same time we are all linked up to one another in a BIG journey. I can respect the BIG journey and do my part and I can respect the little journeys and let them do their thing. Life is good, all of it and everything and everyone will be okay. In my heart I know that through the suffering and the sadness or through the struggles, each and every one of us will ultimately be okay. Even the bad really isn't bad. Just a time for learning and growing. Life is made up of choices, some made by the mind and some made by the soul. But every choice has been ours. Even the ones we think we didn't make, we did. Or at least that's how I see it. So yea I need to not worry.
6. Frustrated
Dominic is three. Three is HARD. It's almost like at this point my son is in some sort of limbo. He's not a baby anymore but he's not grown yet either. And it makes for an interesting mix. I struggle with patience and I struggle not to yell. I feel like right now I have to be so aware with what I do or say. As a baby that wasn't such a worry. he wasn't really paying all that much attention. but now he is watching everything and repeating everything. I catch him saying stuff sometimes and im like where did he learn that, it's awful, and then it hits me that he learned it from me. it's a good learning experience for sure but so so hard. he wants to fight me on everything. what he eats. when it's time for bed. when it's time to get dressed or go out. he doesn't want to brush his teeth or eat good foods. he jumps on the couches at other people's houses and calls me stinky and tells me he doesn't love me. sometimes it feels like he's thirteen not three. and sometimes i feel alone, like im the only one going through this. thank god for other blogs! it reminds me daily that i'm not alone! i love my wild thing i really do. and i give it my all everyday. but sometimes i just feel so frustrated and i question if im doing this parenting thing right. I hope I am. but when i feel judged by others or my mom tells me to remember that im the parent and he needs to remember who has control, I get frustrated because they don't understand. for those that don't have children and they judge? you're an asshole, just wait and see. and for those who's kids have long grown up? you have forgotten what it's like. Dom makes it even harder because he is stubborn, and relentless, and highly sensitive and needy. Some of those qualities will work wonders for him someday, but for now they have this mama worn out.
7. Sad and nostalgic
A very dear, good and old friend of mine is leaving to another country tomorrow. I don't know when I will see her again. She's going on an adventure and I feel so happy for her, but the selfish part of me wants to keep her here. She is like a sister and she's taking a piece of me with her. I watched her pack tonight as we talked and laughed and joked around. I helped her too. I held back tears and pushed them back into the land of denial. Even now I can't really bring myself to accept the fact that she's leaving. We don't see as much of ourselves now as we use to when we were in high school, but that's how it is. but i knew she was here for when ever i wanted to see her or talk to her. i won't have that comfort anymore. of course we will keep in touch, thanks to technology. but it won't be the same. it's hard to let go of someone you get along with so well, you don't run into those people very often. the kind you can tell anything too. the kind that laugh at the same weird things that you laugh at. the kind that still think farts are funny just like you. the kind you can have a full conversation with just through the eyes. the kind that you can go a year without seeing and when you do see them it feels like you just saw them yesterday, nothing awkward about it, no small talk. yea she's that kind of friend. i still remember the first time i met her. big sparkling brown eyes, cute round face and bright yellow sweater and jeans. a shy warm hello and smile my way. i have loved her since then. see you later sweet friend. be happy and be safe. though i am sad now my heart is so full with hope for your fresh start and happiness. i love you.
8. peaceful
it's one thing to be happy and another to be peaceful. I have been striving for inner peace. the kind of peace that isn't rocked by outside sources. the kind that stays flexible and swaying through thick and thin. lately i have been feeling so peaceful. just trusting in the now. knowing things will turn out alright. it feels good. i have my moments, like stated above, but inside of it all i feel peaceful, those are just things i need to work on to further strengthen this peace.
9. healthy
striving to eat more nutritious foods has really got my body feelin' good. and it's so much easier now to know what does and doesn't work for my body. i have more control over what i eat at a more conscious level. it's easier to stay away from temptation. my body craves the food it needs. water, big salads, healthy fats. stuff like that. and i know im headed to a better place. and even though this food journey isn't complete i am definitely feeling healthy.
10. content
life is good. my soul and my belly feel content.
have a wonderful rest of the week lovely souls! tell me, what are some of the things you have been feelin' lately?
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Happy weekending and realizations
This weekend was good, and honestly we needed a good weekend after so many shitty ones. I am incredibly tired right now, in a good way, but still so tired. Yet I felt compelled to come here and sit on this hard wooden chair in front of the computer screen to type out the words to our weekend. I want to remember this one.
On Friday we got up late and decided to eat a quick breakfast and get ready and go bowling. We took the Nooch bowling for the very first time to our favorite little bowling alley. He was so excited to get started and caught on to the concept rather quickly. I took pictures of our matching bowling shoes, his so much cuter than mine because of their miniature size. The hubs rolling his eyes because I take pictures where ever we go and for whatever we do. But I always tell him that when we are 80 he will thank me haha! We played for an hour. I got grumpy because I kept getting gutter balls. I am not good at sports, and even though I know this it still frustrates me when I lose. I always lose yet I guess it's the hope that maybe one day I'll get better that makes me upset. The Nooch one, which was totally awesome! I was so proud of my bowling baby. We ate snacks there and then headed to the arcade for a few games. Then headed home.
I had stuck a whole chicken in the crock pot before we went bowling so the house smelled amazing when we got back. So garlicky was the air! It was my first time cooking a chicken that way so I was nervous about how it would turn out. Uh folks? I will never cook a chicken any other way! It was that good! So juicy! Of course the skin isn't brown and crispy. But for me the juicyness trumps the crispyness, and that's weird for me to say because I love crispy chicken skin! So yea we ate our chicken dinner and had a quiet night at home.
The weather was amazing this weekend by the way. in the high 70's and 80's with blue skies and bright white clouds scattered around. Spring is definitely on it's way, I can feel it. The birds are starting to chirp and the crickets have started playing their music at night as well. You can almost feel it looming right around the corner.
Saturday was spent at a kids museum that a friend told us about. We had a really amazing time there. Dom spent the whole time running around and exploring and climbing and touching everything. The best part being we didn't have to tell him no because this place was meant for that. We are totally going back. After the museum we went to a friends house to celebrate another friends birthday a month late haha! but hey! better late than never right? we ordered pizza and made a salad and had coke and chips. and afterwards we had smore's a la pit fire. So good! what made me the happiest about saturday is how much fun my son had. he was beaming the whole time and it was bitter sweet watching him interact with others. At my friends house he sat around the fire with us and told them about our day at the museum with details and hand gestures that made me think "where did my baby go?" It stabbed at my heart, in a good way, but it made me a little sad too. He really is growing up you know. and though he's only three sometimes i get glimpses of who he's going to be a few years from now and it scares me. i'm never going to get this time back. i have to remember to soak as much of the little bit of baby-ness he has left before it's all gone. The chubby hands, the little voice, the hugs around my thighs. All of it, I love it and it will be missed when it's gone.
Any who we left our get together happily and sleepily and headed home for a very relaxed slumber. Today we woke up late and had a slow morning. We finally peeled ourselves off the couch and got ready to go have some brunch. We ate omelettes and pancakes and enjoyed our surroundings and each other. After brunch we headed to the store to buy some house plants for our apt. We picked two pretty ones and watched them get planted into their new pots. Then we let Dom roam the nursery and look at his favorite thing in the world, water fountains. This kid has an obsession for water fountains. He can look at them for hours. Anywhere we go they are the highlight of his trip. He's always had a thing for water, I wonder what it means. After a while I nudged him away and told him we had to go.
We came home and put our plants in their rightful places and admired them. And you know what happened? After realizing this weekend how big my son was getting he fell asleep in my arms. I sat there on the couch holding him like I did that first week he came into my life. His head on my chest and my arms wrapped around him. We stayed there like that for an hour as the sun went down through the window in front of me. That moment, it just added to the ache in my heart. There he was all 40 inches of him laying on my chest in the same way he use to when he was pink and soft and little and I thought, this may be the last time. I made hubs take a picture. He snapped more than one and they came out beautiful. with the golden hour sunlight splashing around that sleeping baby and his very happy mama. i don't think i can even really put into words what i was feeling. Awe? happiness? saddness? I don't know, but I just know that in that hour our lives were shifting to a different place and I was soaking it all in.
Once he woke up we had dinner. Inside out turkey burgers that were amazing! And then we put dom to bed. now i sit here writing our weekend out feeling the way you feel after a day at the beach. Tired, relaxed, content, happy.
have a good week
p.s. my writing skills are really rusty, part of the reason i wanted to start blogging. i promise ill get a little better. i hope!
here's my crock pot chicken recipe if you wanna try it out.
1 whole chicken 3 to 5 lbs.
I chopped up carrots and celery and stuffed the inside of the chicken with those along with lots of whole garlic cloves (lightly smashed)
I rubbed the chicken with olive oil and then seasoned it with pepper, sea salt, onion powder, and some thyme and dill.
I sliced some garlic cloves and put them on top of the chicken and also some chunks of butter.
I placed it in the crock pot with some chopped up red potatoes and more chunks of butter at the bottom.
I let it cook in there for 5 hours on low.
It was so good, I hope you try it and like it! Happy cooking!
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Belt it in the Shower Hour!!!
I remember back in the 90's when I was a kid being outside playing all day and all night. My neighborhood was full of kids and you could always find us biking, or running, or rollerblading through the two blocks are parents deemed safe. It was so much fun! Baskin Robbins was around the corner from my home and so was the 99 cent store and an awesome place called Steve's Burgers. What was so great about these places is that they were CHEAP! We would run over there and grab a quick and delicious affordable snack and be on our merry way. My mom would holler my name out around the time the street lights would come on. I ignored her until my middle name started being called out too. That's when I knew I had to get my butt in the house.
I would walk in and the house would feel so warm to my over heated body and flushed cheeks and scratchy skin from all the rolling around I did in the grass. I would immediately be sent to the shower. I would spend some time in the bathroom making funny faces in the mirror or shaving my face with my dads razor and shaving cream. Or I would make my hair into crazy do's and laugh to myself. After about 20 minutes of that I would finally peel my icky clothes off and hop into the shower. Yes most likely at that age I probably did hop into the shower. Once in the shower I would proceed to take my sweet time playing with the shampoo or just letting the water run over my body and notice how nice it felt and how relaxing it was. One time I shaved a piece of my hair off just to see what would happen. Let's just say it totally freaked me out and I never did that again. Once all of that was done, I would get down to business and actually clean up. And during the clean up I would SING. Loud, soft, obnoxiously, in low tones and in high. It was my favorite part of my evening. Everyone sounds amazing in the shower so it's an instant self esteem boost that in my opinion everyone needs at least once a day. After that I would get ready for bed and have the most peaceful sleep.
Well the reason I am telling you all of this is that I was thinking tonight while in the shower that I never do any of that anymore. There's no time I tell myself. But that's not true! Instead of making lists in the shower or trying to hurry up so I can get out and do more important stuff I sang again tonight. Like totally sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow in about 50 different ways. I took my time in there. I had fun, I enjoyed my shower dammit! Just like when I was a kid. Why is it that when we grow we lose that? We lose just living in the now and making even something as simple as a shower fun and care free? I know we have responsibilities and things to do. I know that. But I really think singing in the shower or making funny hair do's in the mirror are more important than laundry or dishes. Let's remember that shall we?
So here it is...........a challenge.............give yourself at least one time a week where you belt it in the shower, or do whatever it is that makes you happy and feel relaxed for an hour. Hence belt it in the shower hour. This is my gift to you, I am telling you it's okay to let your hair down and get jiggy with it for an hour a week. Enjoy :)
(all of my blog post are just free write, i type and then i post. i find this works for me. there's no pressure, just me)
I would walk in and the house would feel so warm to my over heated body and flushed cheeks and scratchy skin from all the rolling around I did in the grass. I would immediately be sent to the shower. I would spend some time in the bathroom making funny faces in the mirror or shaving my face with my dads razor and shaving cream. Or I would make my hair into crazy do's and laugh to myself. After about 20 minutes of that I would finally peel my icky clothes off and hop into the shower. Yes most likely at that age I probably did hop into the shower. Once in the shower I would proceed to take my sweet time playing with the shampoo or just letting the water run over my body and notice how nice it felt and how relaxing it was. One time I shaved a piece of my hair off just to see what would happen. Let's just say it totally freaked me out and I never did that again. Once all of that was done, I would get down to business and actually clean up. And during the clean up I would SING. Loud, soft, obnoxiously, in low tones and in high. It was my favorite part of my evening. Everyone sounds amazing in the shower so it's an instant self esteem boost that in my opinion everyone needs at least once a day. After that I would get ready for bed and have the most peaceful sleep.
Well the reason I am telling you all of this is that I was thinking tonight while in the shower that I never do any of that anymore. There's no time I tell myself. But that's not true! Instead of making lists in the shower or trying to hurry up so I can get out and do more important stuff I sang again tonight. Like totally sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow in about 50 different ways. I took my time in there. I had fun, I enjoyed my shower dammit! Just like when I was a kid. Why is it that when we grow we lose that? We lose just living in the now and making even something as simple as a shower fun and care free? I know we have responsibilities and things to do. I know that. But I really think singing in the shower or making funny hair do's in the mirror are more important than laundry or dishes. Let's remember that shall we?
So here it is...........a challenge.............give yourself at least one time a week where you belt it in the shower, or do whatever it is that makes you happy and feel relaxed for an hour. Hence belt it in the shower hour. This is my gift to you, I am telling you it's okay to let your hair down and get jiggy with it for an hour a week. Enjoy :)
(all of my blog post are just free write, i type and then i post. i find this works for me. there's no pressure, just me)
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
10 things
I decided to do a weekly post about 10 things. The 10 things can be anything really. 10 things I'm working on right now or 10 things I love right now. You get the point. So here we go....
Ten Random Things
1. My son misses me.
Ever since we got sick and a big change in our lives happened ( i don't feel comfortable sharing this change yet) we have been so busy and so out of sorts that I have not been spending as much quality time with him as I should be. He's the reason why I decided to stay home. So I could spend as much time with him as possible. I have to work on getting back to a place that feels good to both of us.
2. Spring.
Spring is slowly starting to peak its way in and I am so excited! It was warm enough for us to go to the park today and I took notice of all the little flowers starting to bloom and how the birds were chirping and how clear and blue the sky was.
3. Changing eating habits is hard.
For the past three years we have been slowly changing our eating habits. But recently we have decided that we are going to do the GAPS diet for 6 months and see how it goes. I think my family could use some healing in the gut and certain recent events are telling me it's time. I am scared and nervous. It's a very strict diet and I am scared of failing. But the three of us will be on it and we will be each others support system and we won't know how it goes until we try. This week is the last week that we will eat freely and we start next week. So we have been enjoying little treats here and there like Girl Scout cookies and Pizza. We will really miss pizza. But so much good will come out of going on the GAPS diet and that is what has to stick with me. Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels. That will me our mantra. Wish us luck!
4. I really miss being creative
I have gotten so lazy about doing projects and being creative at least a few times a week. It's part of who I am but it has fallen behind on my to do list. Now it's more like once every few months. So sad! So I am going to try and start creating and crafting at least once a week. Hopefully it sticks and becomes habit again!
5. I am obsessed with talented human beings
I really love to find new raw talent. be it photographers or singers or writers. i love how unfiltered they are at the beginning. before anything else has touched them. before fame has kicked in. it's so beautiful. i will sit there for hours looking at their pictures or hearing them sing. it makes me happy and inspires me too!
6. Lonely
I really need some mama friends man! It would be so nice to be a part of a play group or something. Dom and I get really lonely sometimes. and especially since we are planning on unschooling with dom we need to build some sort of community. But we haven't had much luck. it's hard trying to start up conversations with strangers and i get shy a lot of the time and can't seem to build up the nerve to meet other moms. i feel kind of hopeless about it sometimes and it makes me sad. i guess i have to try harder and see what happens.
7. How much to share
this blogging thing is new to me and i struggle at times as too how much i should share on here. i tend to be very private about my personal life unless i know you really really well and trust in you. so it will be interesting to see what happens here in this little light.
8. I want to do stuff
lately i have been thinking about nothing but doing stuff. i want to take dom ice skating and bowling and to different museums. and i want us to travel as a family and have different experiences. i also can not wait to start hiking and biking this spring. there's so much to do out there in the world and i want to take advantage of that. I encourage you all to do the same thing!
9. Not sleeping sucks
I have always been SUCH a night owl. it's my nature. but having a child doesn't exactly work well with that. so for the past 3 years i have been TIRED. I will go to sleep anywhere between 2 and 5 in the morning and have to wake up with dom between 7 and 9. I am always so so tired. and that's no way to live. but i keep doing it. it's been a hard habit to kick. let's just say i am totally losing at the sleeping game.
10. Get out of my head.
A huge challenge for me has been to get out of my head. to just stop thinking and just be in the NOW. I have to constantly remind myself. my mind just loves to chatter away all day and all night. NOT GOOD. I want to be present in my life not consumed by foggy mind chatter. Life is about the right now, not the tomorrow or the yesterday. life is not meant for worries. it's suppose to be FUN! i want my life to be fun and peaceful and worry free. If i can do that i think i will have gained a great gift. Ill let you know when i get there.
Okay that's all i have for now. See you soon! and until then, many wishes of light love and peace!
Ten Random Things
1. My son misses me.
Ever since we got sick and a big change in our lives happened ( i don't feel comfortable sharing this change yet) we have been so busy and so out of sorts that I have not been spending as much quality time with him as I should be. He's the reason why I decided to stay home. So I could spend as much time with him as possible. I have to work on getting back to a place that feels good to both of us.
2. Spring.
Spring is slowly starting to peak its way in and I am so excited! It was warm enough for us to go to the park today and I took notice of all the little flowers starting to bloom and how the birds were chirping and how clear and blue the sky was.
3. Changing eating habits is hard.
For the past three years we have been slowly changing our eating habits. But recently we have decided that we are going to do the GAPS diet for 6 months and see how it goes. I think my family could use some healing in the gut and certain recent events are telling me it's time. I am scared and nervous. It's a very strict diet and I am scared of failing. But the three of us will be on it and we will be each others support system and we won't know how it goes until we try. This week is the last week that we will eat freely and we start next week. So we have been enjoying little treats here and there like Girl Scout cookies and Pizza. We will really miss pizza. But so much good will come out of going on the GAPS diet and that is what has to stick with me. Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels. That will me our mantra. Wish us luck!
4. I really miss being creative
I have gotten so lazy about doing projects and being creative at least a few times a week. It's part of who I am but it has fallen behind on my to do list. Now it's more like once every few months. So sad! So I am going to try and start creating and crafting at least once a week. Hopefully it sticks and becomes habit again!
5. I am obsessed with talented human beings
I really love to find new raw talent. be it photographers or singers or writers. i love how unfiltered they are at the beginning. before anything else has touched them. before fame has kicked in. it's so beautiful. i will sit there for hours looking at their pictures or hearing them sing. it makes me happy and inspires me too!
6. Lonely
I really need some mama friends man! It would be so nice to be a part of a play group or something. Dom and I get really lonely sometimes. and especially since we are planning on unschooling with dom we need to build some sort of community. But we haven't had much luck. it's hard trying to start up conversations with strangers and i get shy a lot of the time and can't seem to build up the nerve to meet other moms. i feel kind of hopeless about it sometimes and it makes me sad. i guess i have to try harder and see what happens.
7. How much to share
this blogging thing is new to me and i struggle at times as too how much i should share on here. i tend to be very private about my personal life unless i know you really really well and trust in you. so it will be interesting to see what happens here in this little light.
8. I want to do stuff
lately i have been thinking about nothing but doing stuff. i want to take dom ice skating and bowling and to different museums. and i want us to travel as a family and have different experiences. i also can not wait to start hiking and biking this spring. there's so much to do out there in the world and i want to take advantage of that. I encourage you all to do the same thing!
9. Not sleeping sucks
I have always been SUCH a night owl. it's my nature. but having a child doesn't exactly work well with that. so for the past 3 years i have been TIRED. I will go to sleep anywhere between 2 and 5 in the morning and have to wake up with dom between 7 and 9. I am always so so tired. and that's no way to live. but i keep doing it. it's been a hard habit to kick. let's just say i am totally losing at the sleeping game.
10. Get out of my head.
A huge challenge for me has been to get out of my head. to just stop thinking and just be in the NOW. I have to constantly remind myself. my mind just loves to chatter away all day and all night. NOT GOOD. I want to be present in my life not consumed by foggy mind chatter. Life is about the right now, not the tomorrow or the yesterday. life is not meant for worries. it's suppose to be FUN! i want my life to be fun and peaceful and worry free. If i can do that i think i will have gained a great gift. Ill let you know when i get there.
Okay that's all i have for now. See you soon! and until then, many wishes of light love and peace!
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Within the Chaos
There's a certain kind of stillness in the chaos. It's as if the chaos almost forces you to let go.
In the middle of it all you have to stop. Leave the dishes and the cleaning for a later time and concentrate on what's important. This winter season has been total mayhem for my family. We have gotten 3 colds and 1 flu and one heck of a pink eye. I'm not exactly sure why we have gotten sick so much. Especially the noochers, poor bub. But we have. It's been hell. Really, total hell. But every time we have gotten sick there has been grace. It makes me remember just how fragile we are and what a blessing everyday is. I am constantly reminded in between the madness of taking temperatures and washing my hands one zillion times how much I love my family and how much they matter over everything else and how important it is just to be healthy. It baffles me how it takes sickness for me to appreciate health. It is something I should be grateful for everyday. But at least it helps me remember, it helps me to open my eyes just a little wider. Take care of your body for it is your vessel. Hug those you love or call them or tell them how much they mean to you. Stop what you are doing and just play. Don't take life too seriously. Enjoy it. It's why we are here. Thank you sickies for helping me remember. I guess I needed a whole lot of remembering huh?
****for those into natural remedies this is a lovely little concoction that works wonders for coughs and bronchial issues in general when sick with a cold/flu
1 red onion chopped into large chunks
1 large stick of cinnamon or 2 small ones
5 cloves of garlic
A pinch of cloves (like the kind you use on a ham for baking)
Boil for 20 mins or so in water or until the onion is translucent and soft and the garlic has become soft. Strain the liquid and save in a jar. Keeps for a few days, longer in the fridge. Add honey and lemon and take a few tablespoons as needed to relieve a cough. Happy Healing!
In the middle of it all you have to stop. Leave the dishes and the cleaning for a later time and concentrate on what's important. This winter season has been total mayhem for my family. We have gotten 3 colds and 1 flu and one heck of a pink eye. I'm not exactly sure why we have gotten sick so much. Especially the noochers, poor bub. But we have. It's been hell. Really, total hell. But every time we have gotten sick there has been grace. It makes me remember just how fragile we are and what a blessing everyday is. I am constantly reminded in between the madness of taking temperatures and washing my hands one zillion times how much I love my family and how much they matter over everything else and how important it is just to be healthy. It baffles me how it takes sickness for me to appreciate health. It is something I should be grateful for everyday. But at least it helps me remember, it helps me to open my eyes just a little wider. Take care of your body for it is your vessel. Hug those you love or call them or tell them how much they mean to you. Stop what you are doing and just play. Don't take life too seriously. Enjoy it. It's why we are here. Thank you sickies for helping me remember. I guess I needed a whole lot of remembering huh?
****for those into natural remedies this is a lovely little concoction that works wonders for coughs and bronchial issues in general when sick with a cold/flu
1 red onion chopped into large chunks
1 large stick of cinnamon or 2 small ones
5 cloves of garlic
A pinch of cloves (like the kind you use on a ham for baking)
Boil for 20 mins or so in water or until the onion is translucent and soft and the garlic has become soft. Strain the liquid and save in a jar. Keeps for a few days, longer in the fridge. Add honey and lemon and take a few tablespoons as needed to relieve a cough. Happy Healing!
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